Dear Parents, 

Welcome to the annual Convery School for Young Sporting Gentlemen Christmas letter. It only seems a few days since I last wrote to you at the start of term, can the Yuletide season really be upon us already?

Before we move on the happier news of all the festivities that our students have planned, I feel I should take few minutes of your precious time to assure you that any rumours you may have heard about he tensions between the boys in York House and Welsh House have been greatly exaggerated. It is true that Sharp Jnr has been excused from games lessons for the rest of term it is purely to allow him to concentrate on the particularly demanding role he has undertaken in the York House nativity play.

I have had a small preview of their endeavours and I can promise that those of you who are travelling up early to see the performance will not be disappointed. Talbot and Finnerty are particularly exceptional in the main roles of Joseph and Mary and are ably supported, at times literally, by the aforementioned Mr Sharp as their ass. Can I also take this opportunity to thank Mrs Finnerty for all her help creating and laundering the costumes again this year. I’m sure this will mean that young Finnerty’s performance will be whiter than white. In an inspired piece of casting young Lehman has been cast as the Archangel Gabriel. Hopefully this newfound responsibility will encourage him to not make any of those unsavoury gestures toward the audience again this year.

In a break with tradition the older boys of the Convery School for Young Sporting Gentleman will be performing a skit they have written themselves. It will still be based on a fairy tale but they felt that they wanted to “push the envelope” a little further this year. They’ll certainly have their work cut out topping last year’s effort Babes In The Club (House) with Dan Tessier’s fine performance as the dashing Prince Five Iron but I’m sure they’ll manage it somehow.

This year their offering is called Pantherella – a tale of love, struggle and league victory. I must admit they haven’t allowed anyone to see any of it but they have assured me that it will still be heavily based on a fairy tale. Young Corey Neilson from Hood House promises that it will be a real blockbuster but it won’t cost the school a penny more than last year’s. I heard Mr. Thompson, the Head of Mercia House saying that it was all a bit too “Hollywood” for his taste but I’m sure that was only jealousy.

Anyway, I’ve taken up more than enough of your time already so I’ll sign off now and bid you all a Happy Christmas and a healthy new year. 

Mr French


P.S. Please remember that all applications for new pupils who wish to attend the school this year must be received by the board of governors by January 31st at the very latest.

P.P.S. Tickets for the end of year sports day will be available soon.


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